"Jerking Off Animals" by Alexander The Poet 

They are man's best friend,
And they make the greatest pets
One time, just pretend,
This is as good as it gets!

Rub some horse's cock,
Give a polar bear some love
Go stroke off some crock,
But make sure you wear a glove!

Make some reptile moan,
Make some cow explode with milk
Jerk some doggy's bone,
Or some cat's with hair like silk!

You know in the end,
These mammals are so loyal
So be a good friend,
Go jerk off some animal!

THE END