"Seducing Straight Guys" By Alexander The Poet 08.03.04

I received an instant message,
Which had asked me "Hello, a/s/l?"
Reply to it I did manage,
My age, sex, location, I did tell

But then it asked "Straight, bi, or gay?",
To which I replied back, "Excuse me?!"
I typed "Listen, I'm straight ok?",
Then they said, "Oh man, I'm sorry"

"My name's Jim" the person began",
"And I think that you're really hot bro"
"I'd love to give you some head, man",
"Come on dude, your girl won't ever know"

So I got all mad and freaked out,
I yelled, "Dude I'm straight, this shit is sick!"
He said, "Dude, a mouth is a mouth",
"Just close your eyes, pretend I'm a chick"

"Please bother some gay guy!" I cried,
"I'm straight, now give it a fucking rest!"
He said "Gay guys I've done and tried..."
"But seducing straight guys, that's the best!"

THE END