I've often heard this expression said many times and I began to wonder
the ramifications of such an act...

"I Would Cut Off My Left Nut For You"
By Alexander The Poet 04.16.07

I would cut off my left nut for you,
But then, it would be impossible to jerk off
Plus, with just one nut I'd look weird too,
And I do think, that would also feel kinda rough!

I just don't know how else I can prove,
My undying and unwavering love for you
But I know, if left nut I remove,
That will totally suck ass and be painful too!

Maybe I can cut off something else?,
Something else that I, without a doubt, do not need
Maybe my back hair I comb so well,
And cutting of that will not make me cringe and bleed!

Yes, I'd cut off my back hair for you,
What? Oh, that is not good enough for you, you bitch?
Well you know what, fuck-a-doodle-do,
And go bury your fucking self in a some ditch!

THE END