"Strippers Will Break Your Heart"
A short story by Alexander The Poet
Written on Oct. 18, 2003

    "Strippers will break your heart" people kept saying. But the naive guy who's heart was already in love, never listened. For around 3 years, he would visit the strip club once a week. On a rare occasion, twice a week. One day though, he would fall head over heels in love, with a stripper.
   From the second he saw her set foot on stage, with the sexy clothing that she wore, or rather, lack of clothing that she wore, he saw perfection. Nice long dark hair, perfect firm breasts, sexy long legs. The guy was in heaven. Granted her breasts may have been fake, but in these times, and in that profession, most strippers had implants. Those that didn't, would be out of business very quickly. But then again, what attracts our main character to women, hasn't always been primarily breasts. He fancied a cute face and a smile that reeked of decency and generosity. That was the first night that he saw her. He didn't approach her. He just took her beauty in from a distance. Watching her dance. Or in more accurate terms, watching her attempt to dance. As in the case with most strippers, no stripper can literally dance on stage. But to their defense, no man ever comes to a strip club expecting them to. Men just go to strip clubs to see boobs and get lapdances. Before our guy left, he asked the barmaid what the stripper's name was. The barmaid replied "Sadie".
   One week later he returned to the strip club, with a pad and paper. He knew that Sadie would be dancing there that night from the information he gathered the week before. He took his usual seat, ordered a soda, and started writing. What was he writing you ask? A poem ofcourse! How else can a guy attempt to win the attention and the heart of a girl? By writing poems! Or so he thought.
   As soon as she finished her set, he was waiting for her by the dressing room door that every stripper would enter after they finished dancing. He looked at her, like a young schoolboy, and finally uttered the words "Hi." She graciously smiled back and said the same. Then he handed her a folded sheet of paper and said to her "This is for you, read this when you can.". Sadie smiled, said thanks, kissed him on the cheek, and then went into the dressing room.

    The poem read:

Roses are red
 Violets are blue
Please don't be med
 But I like yue

   We must mention here, that our guy had a sense of humor. Which explains the poem you just read above. It had misspelled words there on purpose. And besides, most strippers had difficulty reading to begin with. Atleast that is what was known for ages when it came to that profession.
   Our guy went back to his seat. Anticipating how Sadie would react. About 10 minutes later, she would appear once again. Sadie spotted the guy and briskly walked towards him, totally naked. To the average guy, a vision of a woman nude, would cause unsettling excitement and arousal. But not to our guy in this story. For he has seen so many strippers nude over a span of 3 years that it just lost all its luster.
   She sat down next to him, kissed him on the cheek again, and said how sweet it was. The guy then proceeded to talk to her "I know this may sound weird", he began, "But would you like to meet up sometime, like, outside the club, to hang out or whatever?" Sadie thought for a moment. Ahhh, the sight of a stripper thinking. This gave our guy much hope for a positive answer! Sadie ended up writing down her phone number and said to the guy, to give her a call in 2 days, when she'd be back home. See, the club was in New Jersey. Her home turned out to be in Florida. The guy left the club that night with his spirits high, as well as something else which should be apparent to anyone with a filthy mind.
   2 days had passed. He ended up calling her. To his surprise, they spent a great amount of time talking on the phone. It was agreed that, if she could, Sadie would hang out with him after she finished her work that night, at the club in Jersey. She would be back in Jersey in a month. And so our guy prepared for their next meeting.
   A month had passed, and this time, he arrived at the club, with a rose. A red rose. He figured it would be appropriate at this stage in their courtship. Later that night, when she had free time, between dancing on stage, and giving lapdances to old rich perverts, she approached our guy. But she only had disappointing news to deliver. The news was, that she unfortunately couldn't be able to meet up with him that night. Sadie was very apologetic and promised to call him again once she returned back home to Florida. Our guy left the club that night very upset, but still with much hope.
   Once again, they spoke on the phone. And once again, Sadie promised him that she would definitely hang out with him the next time she was there. Which would again be, in a month.
   That night, in what seemed to be a ritual routine, he returned to the club to see her. At this point, he wasn't so happy and full of life as he had been in previous times. But yet, he still indeed did have hope. Besides, it was a great accomplishment to have a stripper look at you to begin with! Finally, Sadie made her way to him and what she was about to say to him would truly devastate the whole situation at hand.
   "I am so sorry", she began, looking very apologetic and frustrated, "It's just that my husband-". As the moment, our guy heard her utter the words, "my husband", his heart began to cry. "What the fuck?", he whispered to himself. "In all the times, I had spoken with her over a period of 4 months or so, there was never any mention of her having a husband! How could she play with my emotions this way??? She knew very well that I was pursuing her and hoped to have some kind of relationship with her! How could she???" he cried to himself.  But you see, it only got worse. Sadie also had 3 kids. With that said, Sadie admitted that she would not be able to hang out with our guy at all.
   You see, it is irrelevant as to what the situation was with her husband or kids. Just the fact that they were brought up for the first time was what was so bizarre.
   Our guy left the club that night feeling pure utter rage and anger. His heart was torn in two. He spent 4 months of his life pursuing a stripper whom he felt for and thought was decent. He had no intentions of just solely fucking her, although he hoped he would do that in time. But in the end, all she ended up doing was leading him on, with no regard for his feelings.  He arrived home later that night and in a show of uncontrollable fury, posted bad things about Sadie on the internet. Specifically on a message board designed exclusively for the club.
   As our guy laid in his bed that night, he realized that the people were right. Strippers will break your heart.

the end